Brokeback Mountain

While at Philbrook Museum of Art, in front of a painting...

Me: Aw, look at that couple (Native Americans on horseback) looking into each other's eyes! How romantic!
M: Um, I think they are both guys.
Me: Oops.

On Falling

While talking about my scabby face...

Me: Yeah I can't believe I fell twice in three days, and it's not even in love!
L: Haha, but it hasn't harmed your sense of humor!

Humanized Objects

While watching a trailer for Cars 2...

Me: Why do cars have to go to the toilet?
L: *shrugs* Why do cars talk?
Me: Hur hur.

Jokes from Lil' Kids

At a dinner party yesterday night, a friend was giving us riddles that her children had made up for Halloween:

Q: What is a vegetable that is half-dog and half-plant?
A: A collie-flower. O_o

Q: Where does a bee go to pee?
A: The B(ee)P(ee) station!

Children are so adorable, masha-Allah. :)

I Look Like I Mug Elderly Ladies

Dear adorable little fluffy white dog,

It is absolutely unnecessary to be barking ferociously at me every single time you see me, even when you see me from far, say 40 feet away. It hurts my fragile self-esteem, especially since all the other dogs in the neighbourhood (not as cute as you, of course) never pay any attention to me. It is also embarrassing since it puts me in the spotlight and everyone else, who happens to be near, stares at me whenever you do that, and you know that I am such a shy girl. Every night before I sleep, I question myself: What did I ever do to you to make you hate me so much? Is it the colour of my headscarf? 

The owner, a lovely elderly lady, as she held onto your leash tightly so that you would not jump on me and bite my head off, tried to make things better by saying that you are just trying to protect her from me. But I am not convinced.

After all, she's the one rummaging through the dumpster every evening. 

Yours sincerely,

The Hilarious Hijabi.

No More Funny Jokes

My well of wit is currently as dry as the Sahara; I guess I'm not that funny a hijabi. :(

I'm not sure if the following riddle will make things better (via @funnyoneliners):
Q: When is the best time to milk a cow?
A: When she's in the mooooood.

:P Have a lovely weekend, insha-Allah!

Bilinguals

At a lunch with 2 Developmental Psychology (DP) professors...

DP Prof 1: Do you know what Americans call people who speak more than one language?
DP Prof 2: No idea.
DP Prof 1: A foreigner.
DP Prof 2: *chuckles*